i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
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The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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