I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
