u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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