Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
