We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
