if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize