The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
