i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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