I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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