This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
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I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
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