I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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