She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
its not stalking. its research.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Your cock deserves a montage
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
