It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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