She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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