So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
