the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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