A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
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