Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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