Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize