I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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