it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Randomize
