No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
where are my pants?
in the oven.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
