I think I won the penis lottery.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
