Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
