The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
