this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
