I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Randomize