so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
We are two peas in an std pod
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
