Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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