YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
