you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
