Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
