i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
