i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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