"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
