thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
