i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
God I need to hump something, right now.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
