The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
