another moral hangover. fuck.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
