Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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