she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
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In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
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Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Pooping to opera.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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