He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize