at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
its not stalking. its research.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
