OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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