So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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