Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
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