did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
