Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
it glows. i had to have it.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
