I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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