What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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