Just cropdusted the office
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
