I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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