My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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